As I sit here on the floor with things scattered on the floor. It brings back horrible memories. I remember moving after my ex left us. We stayed till they put the notice on our door. Went from a 3200 sq foot house to a 850 sq town house. The boys and I sold what we could and just threw out years of memories. The words that he spoke lingering in my head. You will have nothing with out me. Your just a loser who works for minimum wage. No career and money. I sat on the floor then too and looked at was used to be a happy house. House filled with kids and birthday party’s and Christmas parties. Pets running around kids playing. Now nothing but a mess and emptiness. Just like my life…..
This time much different. I did it! I did what he said I could never do. I got my own house on my own. The first house with our new family just the boys and I. But yet I sit here on the empty floor with tears in my eyes. With each move I get rid of more and more. Soon there will be nothing left. Soon my boys will be the ones leaving me.
Who will want me then? I will have nothing left but empty rooms. Will I ever find the one who won’t leave me? No one ever understands me. No one ever wants to be my forever. Not sure if my heart has anything to give. It’s been shattered so bad. Maybe some day it will heal. This last break just destroyed it. I have nothing left to give. I hope for it to repair. I know when my boys leave me that will break me more then anything. I will have no one and nothing but a house with empty rooms with things scattered all over the floor…….